April 1 - Audiophile Review obtained a copy of a secret arrangement between Magico, Wilson Audio, and YG Acoustics agreeing to merge. The preliminary contract mentions several potential names for the new enterprise, including MAGWILY, $1MperCo, and I.O.U Acoustics.
The goal of the merger, according to papers, purloined by the infamous hacker group AzA, is "World domination of speaker sales between $50,000 and $100,000." The new company will be based on the Utah/Colorado border in a small town called New Ordway, whose previous claim to fame was when a polygamist group vanished overnight back in 1984, never to be heard from again. The new company will occupy this former religious complex that features over twenty bathrooms and five and one half hot tubs.
The first product from the new firm will feature a special tweeter developed in conjunction with NOA (National Oceanic and Atmospheric) that boasts flat frequencies out to 250 kHz. Made principally of Copernicium, an element made up of super-heavy atoms, the new tweeter is only 48 dB efficient and requires approximately 10,000 watts to drive to normal listening levels.
To fill a pressing need for a 10,000-watt amplifier, the company's early press release mentions work is almost complete on the late Harvey Rosenberg's "Black Hole" amplifier. The first prototype "Red Dwarf" model will be tested in late June during a period of maximum solar flare activity (necessary for the tube heater warm up charge) and production models should be available before the 2013 CES. Several nearby stars have already been earmarked as potential power-supply sources for the amplifier and auxiliary comets will be available for those who prefer a more off the grid power source.
April Fools. No Merger. No New Ordway. No Aza. No MAGWILY. No NOA. No Black Hole.
Copernicium is real, though, just not in a tweeter...